syberax87
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Name: syberax87
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Member Since: 11/2/2004

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Thursday, November 13, 2008

bible story

long story short . what a woman wants the most in life is self determination... .   


Friday, September 05, 2008

challenges

so i was thinking what do teens with common mental illnesses face.

 

anxiety- struggle to be yourself , depression and anger.

depression- struggle to be understood  which leads to low confidence.

misguided psyche- feeling of detachment and or superiority towards people. dislike of them.

not enough love in your life - represt childhood emotions which leads to heavy drug use in a slef bid to

discover yourself. but a mind like that is already messed up. and he will only discover one thing no matter what he claims - drugs are good for me since im temporarily not dealing with the pain in my head. sometimes they get insane ideas. but those ideas could be good or bad. just look at hitler , and that women writer whose name i dont remember.

then there are the people who got to much love in their childhood and thne wake up to a cold harsh wordld and go into a downward spiral of depression in their teens. they reminise of their childhood and refuse to let anything in the present to take its place.  if that doesnt stop , it wont end well.

i can relate to all of these and more.

what they all have in common is two things.  they all say im a realist cause i have this and this problem.

and non of them take any responsibilty for their actions.    THE LADDER BEING THE ONLY CURE TO MOST MENTAL ILLNESS . pills can make u feel different for a while but cant change ur actions. only u can do that.  im still waiting for me to grow up fully i wont deny that. but it seems im not the only one who hasnt grown up enough.

 


upstate

well im going upstate today. kind off feel weird about it . but it will be fun. cant wait till next weekend  reunion . followed by ac with my best friend. atleast i wont have to worry about  drug dealer referal slips and people  running away from there problems upstate. I used to think that a song like umbrella by rhiana applies to my situation .  but not that i look at it  the words . 

 

 

                         '' miss me ''

                         '' miss me''

                         '' now you u got to kiss me ''

 

 

come to mind.  life is a very interesting game of chess. just dont give up all your pieces in the opening debut . cause the middle game will be hard , which is were we are now.  but if u are in a bad position in the middle game. its time to check raise. favorite song  kid rock all summer long. reminds me of summer wishes.


Friday, June 27, 2008

gay party

Last week I went to a party  where half of the party was gay. Mostly gay men including the host. Shows u how bored they are in long island. anyway its was a fun experience. Shows u its very easy to tolerate everybody and even be nice to them as long as they keep their hands above the belt and/ or dont offend u.


Friday, June 06, 2008

the trip

aside from the immense fu i had and all the money i spend on beautiful things, i also learned a lot.
That god most likely exists and can be proven in many different ways. that the torah contains all the events that happened and will happen. that all modern day religions including islam christianity and buddhism are based on jewish ideas. that the torah gave us all the values that build our modern world and that we know hold for granted. what to do with this knowledge is another question. probably suppress it .

the memory of the last 6 months still haunts me



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